wasted money

Sometimes I sit back and take stock of the shit I’ve bought and can’t believe I’ve actually wasted money on it! If my husband only knew I’d be in deep shit for years, but, fortunately for me, I’m the one who handles the bills around here. I’ve been thinking about this for a few days and decided what the hell – it’s time to put it out there.

Wasted Money #1: HAPIFork

You read that right. I bought a damn fork – ONE fork! Why? Well, it’s supposed to help you eat slower so you lose weight. Damn – I’m a fucking idiot! I think I used it twice. My husband found it yesterday while we were trying to (laughably) organize the basement. This bitch was $80!

Wasted Money #2: MyHydrate Water Bottle

This isn’t just any old water bottle – it keeps track of the water you drink. Because counting for yourself is just too fucking hard. I’ve used this a grand total of 3 times. The damn thing was $40; I spent $40 on a water bottle because I didn’t count my glasses of water. Talk about stupid.

Wasted Money #3: Books on Dieting

If there’s a book on dieting, I’ve either bought it or wanted to buy it. But, here’s the thing – of the ones I’ve bought I’ve read….0! I found 2 of them over the long weekend and couldn’t believe I paid money for them. What the hell is wrong with me?! Cost? Hundreds of dollars.

Wasted Money #4: Weight Loss Supplements

We all want immediate results when we’re losing weight and I’m no different. I’ve tried almost every weight loss supplement out there and guess what? I pissed that money down the toilet! They don’t work and God knows what they actually do to your body. Cost? Thousands of dollars.

I have a problem and it’s time for me to seek treatment. Not only am I an emotional eater, apparently I’m an emotional spender, too. I’ve got issues, I tell ya. It’s high time I take stock of what’s really important and stick to a damn budget. To hell with all this crap that’s supposed to make losing weight easier. There’s no such thing!